Life - The Longest Journey

Inspirational Quotes

2011-01-11T06:17:00.000-08:00

Quote of the day!

[ Don't be afraid to reach for your dreams. Do it while you can. Nothing will ever happen if you don't make a first move. So seize the opportunity while you can ]

Life seems so shaky, with good & bad days.
But sometimes the bad days seem to arise from within me.
Not a bad day in reality, but in my head, so many wars are going on.
Pressure of not being as good as others,
Regrets of the time wasted not doing something i love,
Lack of courage to pursue what I enjoy,
Feeling useless to the world,
With no great achievements.

I wonder what put those thoughts in my head.
Thoughts that can destroy me from within if not carefully handled.
But then, those thoughts can be motivational when perceived in an optimistic way.
I realised I wanna be different
I wanna overcome my lack of courage and go out there to do things i love.
I have to overcome my fear of failure.
I can't let this fear hold me back.
No I won't let that happen.
I wanna be free from fear of failure.
And I wanna grow old and one day look back thinking,
"I have no regrets of my past"

As a reminder to myself~

Missing you~

2010-09-27T18:47:00.000-07:00

Thank you for telling me I look beautiful when I think I'm not

Just by the way you look at me, I feel special & beautiful

Thank you for lifting me up from my low self esteem

Without you I wouldn't be as happy as I am now

Thank God He blessed me by sending you

To tell me I look beautiful everyday

To tell me I can be myself

And still be loved

Thank you!

Little Imperfections

2010-09-27T06:38:00.000-07:00

Nobody is perfect. Ever. Agree?

When it comes to appearances, most of us are usually quite concious about it. I mean, who isn't?

But is there a time in your life you wished u look prettier? or taller? slimmer? smoother skin? etc...the list goes on..

I'm pretty sure most people been through that. And honestly i'm no exception. I've been through the insecurities of how i look, my hair, face, everything about me!

But after awhile i started to realise, God created me this way, why am i always wanting more?

I should be thanking God for eyes to see, hands to hold, legs to walk, etc.. this list goes on and on too! And in fact, this list goes on longer than the list of our imperfections that we see.

Do you know that any imperfections you see on yourself is just only ur negative perception of urself? You make hate ur straight hair, but others, love it! You may think ur too dark, but others may think you look great!

So don't be too hard on yourself. Being happy and content with what you've got, yeah this will definately make u a prettier person :) just a smile and a happy heart can make you look beautiful and sparkling :) So show those sparkling teeth, like this =D

To add on, i believe every imperfection we have makes us special as who we are =) I was looking through a magazine when i saw the pictures of Miss Universe and the runner ups. No doubt they look beautiful and stunning, I love the way they look.

But one thing i realised, is that generally they all have almost the same look. Straight, pearly white teeth, beautifully curled hair, nice body shape and all.

So you might think your freckles make u look weird, but no, i think they make u special as being you!

We need to learn to love ourselves and stop comparing with others. Yes i do still get very insecure about how i look sometimes. But i keep reminding myself that God created me this way and He loves me so much.

See the beauty of God's creation? Perfection in our imperfection.

People judge by outward appearance,but the Lord looks at the thoughts and intentions

1 Samuel 16 : 7

Signing off,

Yie-ern :)

Back to Blogging!

2010-09-26T00:03:00.000-07:00

Its been ages ever since i last posted something here... I realise my writing skills have deteriorate terribly since i havent been writing down my emotions much.

The only thing i write about now? Essays on the human body, scientific reports, etc...Feels like thats the only thing i'm used to writing about.

I don't wanna lose touch to how to express my emotions through words, but don't get me wrong, i do still express them through facial expressions and verbal expression :) I just need to learn how to jot them down again.

Looking back to my older posts, i realise i loved to write emo poetic stuff!! Its great looking back on m life :) Now i know my past mistakes and how i used to be. But i guess people change in time, its whether for the better or worst. I'm happy to say that i'm more positive now than before, all thanks to God who changed me inside out :)

And not forgetting my family and friends whom God has blessed me with :)

I'll end this with my favourite quote;
Count your blessings! Don't worry about what you don't have but be happy with what you've got :)

Cheers!
Yie-Ern

Ps: i Dont know if i'll continue writing or this might be a dead blog once again! Depends on my mood la ;)

Lost

2009-09-06T03:22:00.000-07:00

Everything else fades
Turned into memories I don't want to remember
Everything changed
But my love for you stays
And I wonder why
Why am I still hurting?
I thought I moved on
Didn't I?

I don't want it, but I want it too
What is it that I want?
Going back to you means more pain
Everytime you leave, my heart breaks

Letting you go also hurts
But I know its what I should do
Still, why is it so hard to walk away from you?

The fact is, I want you, but I don't want you too.
So what do I do?

So many times I wanna run straight back into your arms
But I keep reminding myself
That you'll only cause more pain
So bear with it now
For time would heal
Wouldn't it?
Cause now it seems like the wounds won't heal

My friends tell me I deserve better
I deserve someone who loves me much more
Someone who won't just walk away

Oh why did you walk away?
Why did you throw away your very last chance?
Why did break your promise I held so closely to myself?
Didn't you know I was serious,
When I said I won't tolerate you doing this AGAIN?

But when you came back
With a simple sorry
It hurts me even more
To say I can't do it anymore
Because I love u dearly
I miss everything that used to be
I want you, but I don't want you too

This is how it feels like
To turn down the one you love
You probably didn't think it hurts
But it kills me inside
Until today I still feel it.

But...
How many times did you have to walk out on me?
How many times do you wanna break me?

Cause now,
I would have to pick up the broken pieces
And fix it back together
One piece at a time.

The tears would stop eventually
The pain will fade as well the love
By then, you won't have any control over me
No more.

Environmental Management Field Trip

2009-08-16T03:51:00.000-07:00

Just a short one

Went for this field trip about 2 weeks back if i'm not mistaken.

Special thanks to Steven for the gorgeous pics =)

First went to Kelana Jaya Lake to catch fish and insects using the nets.

Thats Dr Kathy, our env lecturer =)

The lake was soooo polluted.. typical i guess..

Eddy trying to fish something.

Then went to Gombak Forest, hiked down to the river. The water was cool and refreshing =)

Eunice was 'lucky' to be the only one who got a leech attached to her xD Just love her reaction.

And she got stuck in the river cos the current was alil too strong for her. Then a frog kinda jumped in her direction when she was trying to balance herself xD It was hilarious..

Wheee, that's us =]

Managed to catch some weird bugs that live in the river:

After the whole trip I drove Eddy and Jolyn to 1U.

On the way back I got lost.

But found my way back after a few rounds x)

Lotsa love,

Walk away

2009-07-28T07:37:00.000-07:00

Love doesn't walk away, people do

Smile...

2009-07-27T07:36:00.000-07:00

Feeling kinda happy now, I'm not sure why.
Its been awhile since i last feel this relieved and calm.
Maybe its because of the smses I received, from beloved friends.
And all the time I taken off to be alone.
And most importantly, the love and assurance God provided me
Made me strong enough to face each day

Thinking back to the times you were there

I realised

That you were always there

Whether I'm at my happiest, or at my worst

You never seem tired of me

Never gave up on me

And I wonder why

I deserve a friend like you

A friendship so rare,

So precious, like diamonds

But to me,

You're worth more than that

Cause a friendship like ours

Is priceless

And everlasting I pray.

Yeap S.W, this is for you.

And to another friend

My bestfriend since college

Its been only a year plus

But I know I found my best friend

After years of wondering

Why others never seem to completely know me

The way you do.

Through busy schedules

You squeeze in time for me

No matter how tired you are

Its always others first

And yourself last

And once again

I wonder

What you see in me as a friend

Cause when i look at myself

I see nothing special

While you're way better

In everyway.

Pretty sure you know who you are

Yeah, I love you too.

Still have a few more friends to go.

But I'll save that for later.

Cause I prefer shorter but sweet posts.

I'm off to finish my biotech essay. Got so much work to do!

Thank you Dear Lord, for everything I don't deserve.

1st Week of Uni [second sem] =)

2009-07-24T06:52:00.000-07:00

Candid shot of me

Gotta admit there were alot of emoing during this whole week, but still, the happy moments were also present =]

Let me go through each day briefly. For my own reference =]

Monday;
First day of the 2nd sem!! Woke up early, made sure i have breakfast AND coffee x) Haven't been sleeping and eating well lately, but i'm coping.

Oh ya. Jeremy, Charles, Huey Lin and I (plus a few others) attended prayer meeting at 7.15am near the green house. Kinda refreshing =)

And here's the list of subjects i'm taking, ranked from 1 to 4 [1 for my fav] =P

Environmental management [1]
Biology [2]
Chemistry [3]
Biotechnology [4]

First day was alright. Though I somehow felt i needed some time alone.

Tuesday;
Classes ended early, so we went sunway piramid to celebrate Charles's birthday in advance =]

Ate at Zan mai i think x) its some japanese restaurant.

Jeremy caught a fly with a tissue x) Then Charles started experimenting his photography skills with the fly!

Then went for karaoke =)

The funniest part was when the guys were trying to sing 'poker face' by Lady Gaga xD
But otherwise, it was fun, and rather emoing i must say, judging by the number of emo songs we sang.

Wednesday;

The most emo day would be today. I have no idea why, but i think its because i'm so tired of faking smiles and pretending i'm happy. I am happy at times, but i need alot of time. And people who understands that i rather stay quiet at times. I'm really sorry. I just need time to recover.

I remember answering a friend's question (i forgot what the question is) I told her that i get lonely at times as well. She was shocked I told her that, and she said, " What?? You also get lonely mer? But you're always around friends and you seem so happy"

There's nothing wrong thinking that way. My point is that being around alot of friends doesn't make you less lonely. In fact, to me, the more friends I have, the lonelier I get, the more smiles I have to fake, the more tired of life i get. What's wrong with me?? I feel so fake. So much pretending that I don't even know myself anymore.

But I let it all out that night.

Thursday;

Felt much much better today after last night. Went to uni with a genuine smile =) heee.

But before leaving house today, I got chased by a huge (larger than the size of my hand) moth! I was terrified till I couldn't leave house cos it was standing at my doorway! lol, And i was wondering if I should call jeremy up to chase it away or i'l just have to skip classes cos I'm really really afraid of it. And I hope I didnt wake my neighbours cos i was screaming when it flew towards me, lol =P

Suppose to meet Seng wai since monday till now, didn't manage to because my friends decided to drive to ss15 (near Taylors) for pork balls noodles that takes 30 mins to arrive due to its popularity x)
Had to split into 2 tables cos the group was too big. Overall it was an awesome day, had so much fun =)

Went back for Biotech tutorial. Eddy embarrassed me when he said my name out loud when he saw a picture of a kitten in the video we were watching for biotech. Not to mention it was in a lecture hall where everybody was quiet. Just because I was playing with a stray kitten during lunch x) I was praying the lecturer didn't hear him. He did that again during environmental management lecture -.-

Then after class Evie drove me to Tropicana Mall. We both watched the latest Harry Potter movie! It was super cool, and i loved it.. especially since they were quite a few cute guys in the movie x) Haha, and Evie and I managed to hide my ice cream (coned) in my bag while entering for the movie, lol!

Friday;

Hmm, today was ok. Not too happy, not too emo in uni. Though at home its mostly emoing. By the end of this week my 'homework' list is piling up like crazy! Its driving me nuts and i'm getting nervous.

Tomorrow; [saturday]

lol. Today havent happened yet. But a quick overview of what we're gonna do.

I would be driving Jeremy to Eddy's place, then we'll take a bus to Petaling Street, where we'll meet Jolyn and Chia May =)

Haha, MY FIRST TIME driving a friend ALONE without my parents by my side!!! =D I'm so excited!! Don't worry, I already warned Jeremy that I tend to day dream while driving x)

So yea, for my record,

First outsider I drove with parents around - sis's boyfriend
First Friend I'l be driving without parents around - Jeremy Ng!
=D

I thank God for this week. For all the pain and joy I went through, I know it''ll be put to good use in the future.

With much love,
Yie-Ern

Breathe

2009-07-22T08:34:00.000-07:00

Taylor Swift feat. Colbie Caillat

I see your face in my mind as I drive away,

Cause no one of us thought it was gonna end that way.

People are people and sometimes we change our minds.

But it’s killing me to see you go after all this time.

Music starts playin’ like the end of a sad movie,

It’s the kinda ending you don’t really wanna see.

Cause it’s tragedy and it’ll only bring you down,

Now I don’t know what to be without you around.

And we know it’s never simple never easy.

Never a clean break, no one here to save me.

You’re the only thing I know like the back of my hand,

And I can’t,

Breathe, without you,

But I have to,

Breathe, without you,

But I have to.

Never wanted this, never wanna see you hurt.

Every little bump in the road I tried to swerve.

But people are people,

And sometimes it doesn’t work out,

Nothing we say is gonna save us from the fall out.

And we know it’s never simple,Never easy.

Never a clean break, no one here to save me.

You’re the only thing I know like the back of my hand,

And I can’t,

Breathe, without you,

But I have to,

Breathe, without you,

But I have to.

It’s two a.m.

Feelin’ like I just lost a friend.

Hope you know it’s not easy,

Easy for me.

It’s two a.m.

Feelin’ like I just lost a friend.

Hope you know this ain’t easy,

Easy for me.
And we know it’s never simple, never easy.

Never a clean break, no one here to save me.

Ohhh

Sorry (oh) Sorry (mmm)

Sorry (eh eh) Sorry (mmm)

Sorry

Just can't sleep..

2009-07-18T11:11:00.000-07:00

Its 2 + am, and I still can't sleep. Just too many thoughts swirling in my head. I'm off.

From within

2009-07-17T08:43:00.000-07:00

I'm not mad anymore, just upset.

The silence does not mean love has faded,

Neither does it mean I don't miss you,

Cause I would be for a long, long time.

The memories remains,
I can't help but to smile whenever I am reminded of it,
No matter how much it hurts to think of it.

Thank you for the times you made me smile,
And for making me feel like I was special,
Cause I do appreciate it all.

Forgive me for the wrong that I've done,
The pain I put you through,
And know that I never meant to.

For all the happiness you brought into my life,
The comfort you provided,
And being the company I needed,
I pray I brought all these into your life as well,
Because I never want to see u walk away thinking I'm a complete waste of time,
You may go, but bring the memories with you,

And I will keep mine.

I found my peace,
Through forgiveness.

Thoughts

2009-07-16T22:20:00.000-07:00

Why do I believe, that miracles come true for the people I pray for,
But doubt prayers for my own.

Why do I care so much,

When it hurts in the end.

Why do I worry about you,

When you don't even appreaciate me.

Why do I wish you're happy,

When I hide all my pain behind a mask.

Why do I hurt so much,

When there's no point in grieving.

Why? I keep asking myself.

But I know I would never get answers.

Not until I believe God can make miracles in my life.

And not only in other's.

And I wonder,

Why some friends,

Never seem to give up on me,

Always there to pick me up,

Even when i refuse to listen.

Why?

Maybe its because of something called LOVE?

12th July 09

2009-07-12T05:08:00.000-07:00

Some people come into our lives, leave footprints, and we are never the same.

But you left me scars for life,

Memories I wish I could erase,

And all the trust I place in you,

That I regret most.

Was I so blind?

To not see all these?

Behind those sweet words I love to hear,

Are all lies,

Made to destroy me inside out,

Everything just a big fat lie,

I wish I was never that stupid,

To believe what you said,

For they only bring tears in the end.

I gave my best,

Poured out my heart,

Trusted you to not break it,

And all i get,

Are scars and wounds,

That feels like it can never heal.

Of everything in life that I did,

The one I regretted most,

The one that I hated myself for doing so,

The one that breaks my heart into a million pieces,

Is loving you,

With all my heart.

There goes me and you,

For it can never be the same,

Ever.

GOD help me please.. For this is all I can take.

Life through different set of eyes

2009-07-10T09:23:00.001-07:00

I may not be rich...

But I'm not homeless

I may not have luxurious food to feast on everyday

But I have food to fill my stomach

I may not be hot like these supermodels...

But I'm not handicapped

I may feel lonely at times...

But I was never alone, for God gave me a family, friends and other loved ones.

I may feel unwanted and not loved...

But I have faith that one day I would be reunited with the one I love

I may be ungrateful or unsatisfied with my life,

But I take time off to thank God for the blessings He so generously poured out on me,

No matter how undeserving I am.

Shopping + Sleepover

2009-07-08T07:17:00.000-07:00

On the 6th of July, Evie & I went One Utama for our long-awaited shopping spree! =D

Its been awhile since we last went out together. Though we've been catching up through phone calls, i really miss what used to be for the both of us.

Thats me and sleepover / shopping buddy ; Evie =)

We used to hang out 5 days a week (without fail) last year when we're both still CIMP-ians. We gossiped, talk about common stuff we both face, our teachers, friends, homework, presentations and also how much we hated certain subjects (like accounts and physics) =P and of course the guys in our lives.

Evie is definately a strong girl =) Always putting others ahead of her, and often TOO nice. Somehow she seems to know how to make me feel good about myself =) Thank you for all the support and encouragement you provided me with. Glad our friendship came with no price tags on.

Here we go =P Shopping!

Love the colour of the dress, but its freaking uncomfortable in that.
Evie looks gorgeous though =)

Was one of the best shopping trip we had, not so emo and more spending x)

We saved the emo session for the sleepover that night =P

Top : Both the same top but different colours
Bottom : Evie found a gorgeous pink stripped top =) lovely on her

Trying on clothes we know we can't afford x)

[I love turquoise!]

I realised I'm always trying on sleeveless tops. Others seem too big for me...

Thats me at Zuup, had lunch there =) It was awesome.

After the shopping we had sleepover at my place! =D

Watched 50 First Date with Evie, we both laughed so loud x) Not to mention it was about 12 am then.

After the movie we emo-talk till 3am. Started off with the topic on insects and our personal encounter with them x) Grasshoppers, centipedes, cockroaches, etc.. Wonder why we talked about that, but it was funny!

But i'm glad I could tell someone what i've been keeping inside. All my insecurities, confusion in life, self-esteem problems, etc.. Glad i could listen too. I really appreciate them all.

To my dearest Evie, thanks so much for being the bestfriend I always needed and hope for. Till this day i wonder what i did to deserve such a friend, a friend so precious and priceless and definately one in a million. Thank God for that.

Frozen in time

2009-06-23T17:44:00.001-07:00

Gonna let everything pass just like that..
Just can't handle everything that's going on
Not gonna look back anymore, though i really miss the old days
Just so tired, so tired..
Sometimes i lie in bed, i wonder what's life all about
Why does it seem so stagnant at times?
Just when u thought everything is going smoothly
You can almost predict that the hardest part of life is coming
Or is it because you made urself believe so?
Life is like a roller coaster
When ur feeling like ur on top
You know instantly what's coming next - the downfall
Don't you think so?

Sometimes we blame others for things that happened
But do we reflect on ourselves?
Other times we blame ourselves
But can we fully blame ourselves for whatever happens?
Life is just complicated
But also a perception

There are some things that i don't want, but somehow i miss it so much
I don't want it anymore...i give up..
Was it my fault? should i regret?
Guess i'll just let it pass me by
Not gonna care anymore

Just let it go... time would heal.

Boredom

2009-06-08T03:35:00.000-07:00

Omg i think i'm gonna flung my exams. Nothing seems to be going into my head when i study!

What's wrong with me this year... Slacking like crazy.

I need motivation to study! Sigh.

Take a look at my 'wonderful' exam timetable

Management - 15th June
Biology - 18th June
Chemistry - 23rd June
Statistics - 26th June

Alright, gotta go drive my daddy out !! =] One of my motivation to study, I love driving =P

Patience

2009-04-16T20:21:00.000-07:00

by Take That

Just have a little patience

I'm still hurting from a love I lost

I'm feeling your frustration

Any minute all the pain will stop.

Just hold me close inside your arms tonight

Don't be too hard on my emotions.

[Chorus:]

'Cause I

Need time

My heart is numb, has no feeling

So while I'm still healing

Just try and have a little patience.

I really wanna start over again

I know you wanna be my salvation

The one that I can always depend.

I'll try to be strong

Believe me I'm trying to move on

It's complicated but understand me.

[Chorus]

'Cause the scars run so deep

It's been hard but I have to believe

Just have a little patience [x2]

[Chorus]

Have a little patience

My heart is numb, has no feeling

So while I’m still healing

Just try and have a little patience

David Archuleta! =D

2009-04-13T03:57:00.000-07:00

The next day after Good Friday, i woke up early, helped mum with chores, and went to sunway piramid with Kathleen to watch David Archuleta live! =)

Due to the hurry i was in, i forgot to bring my camera along =.= So i had to rely on Kath's camera and our handphones =P

Kath won 2 tickets from Hitz.fm, all thanks to her that i could see him x)

The line to enter the place was super duper long. And there was no shade where the line was. So yea, as usual, i got sunburned again.... this time my shoulders, because i was wearing sleeveless and a halter. You could actually see the lines (due to the halter) on my shoulders =(

And i saw a few of my friends there =) Was great to have bumped into them, havent seen them in ages.

We waited for about an hour and half for him =P the place was so packed and squishy. Not to mention it was so hot in there.

But it was worthwhile =)

Finally he appeared =) I really think he's one of the most nice and humble celebrity ever =)

haha.. i was screaming when i saw him x) Just for fun, since the crowd was screaming as well, lol.

And I think he's really sweet, judging by the songs he sings =) haha, most of the girls who attended was about 14 to 16 years old x) Because David himself is still so young x) about my age i think.

Too bad i didn't get to see him personally, wish i could. (Isn't that what every girl wants?) =P Overall, he was awesome! =D

So after the whole showcase, we went back to Sunway Piramid for dinner at Tony Roma's =P

That was all =) i reached home about 9pm, and went straight to bed after bathing x)

Good Friday =) [another late post~]

2009-04-13T03:00:00.000-07:00

Phew.. its been a long and hectic week in uni..but it was a friday, plus our one week holidays has finally arrived! =D (Though there's still tons of quizzes and assignments to finish)

Took a short nap after uni, then ate dinner and rushed to Jeremy's church (Glad Tidings) with Evie, Jeremy, my bro and Jeremy's bro =) I'm so glad my mum allowed me to attend church that friday night. Met up with En Loong and Timothy when we arrived =)

They had a wonderful drama/musical called 'Beyond Tears' which i find so emotional and touching. Its a story to encourage people to become organ donors =)

I love praise and worship sessions =) Its a wonderful feeling to be there again to worship. But whats important is that i honour God wherever i am, whether in church or not =) Whether or not i'm still allowed to church, its more important that i keep Jesus in my heart ~

After service, we all went to Mc Donalds for a late night snack =P Came back home about 12am. But it was awesome =D

'Be joyful always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus"
1 Thess 3:16

Everyday is a new day~

2009-04-05T00:14:00.000-07:00

It hurts so badly to lose a best friend
Someone you trust
Someone you thought you could count on
The pain seems too real
The betrayal too painful to think its true
Is love suppose to be this painful?
Or is it all just a big lie?
Do i mean so little to you, that you can just walk away like that?
Anger builds up inside
But no, i choose forgiveness
How else would i continue life if not forgive?

But life goes on right?
I won't stop to regret
Neither would i stop, to think of how it would be like if you didn't leave
I won't forget those times
I would cherish every moment
Though they're probably just lies, tears and betrayal
At least i know i had been faithful
Thats all that matters to me right now

But hey, everyday is a new day
So give praise to the Lord
For the pain won't last
Feels good to know I'm not alone
Thank God for the friends He provided me with
Friends who provide the laughter everyday
And would cry with me

So here I am,
Looking forward to each new day
For each new day brings more laughter
Yup, i know tears can't be avoided
But like you said, the storm won't last =)
Soon it would be over
What's life without tears right?

hehe, looking forward to uni =P so stressful but so fun. Been enjoying uni life so far. Will try to get pics of uni friends =) would keep those pics as memories.
And i can't wait to go shopping with my dearest Evie!! =]
hehe, and can't wait for next sat! =D Got tickets to go see David Archuleta's showcase =) All thanks to Kathleen who won 2 tickets =P

=]

Praying for the best~

What if...?

2009-03-09T06:57:00.000-07:00

What if, you didn't have to leave me behind?

What if, I don't have to dream of you just to be with you?

What if, you're here with me? To accompany me through storms and sunshines?

Would I still go through what i go through so often?

Would I lie in bed everynight, wondering when would I see you again?

So many friends around, but somehow deep down inside, I'm wishing I could see you.

Missing you had become part of my everyday life.

2 years for a dying cancer patient seems so short,
But 2 years for someone waiting just seems too long to bear...

Ironic isn't it?

Happy Birthday Jeremy!

2009-03-08T10:22:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Jeremy!

Finally 19 years old!

Thank you for being a blessing in my life =)

For all the times you've been there to listen..And the little things u do, thank you, i really do appreaciate it. What would I be now without you to help me through my hardest moments?

Just by being in my life, you made a huge difference.

Happy Birthday again =)

May the good Lord bless you always.

Cry on my shoulders

2009-03-07T06:11:00.000-08:00

If the hero, never comes to you
If you need someone, you're feeling blue

If you wait for love, and you're alone
If you call your friends, nobody's home

You can run away, but you can't hide

Through a storm and through a lonely night

Then I'll show you there's a destiny

The best things in life, they are free.

But if you wanna cry, cry on my shoulder

If you need someone, who cares for you

If you're feeling sad, your heart gets colder

Yes I show you what real love can do.

If your sky is grey oh let me know

There's a place in heaven, where we'll go

If heaven is a million years away

Oh just call me and I'll make your day

When the nights are getting cold and blue

When the days are getting hard for you

I will always stay here by your side

I promise you, I'll never hide.

What real love can do

what real love can do

what love can do

Love can do.

Uni Life...

2009-03-04T07:29:00.000-08:00

Its just the 3rd day of uni and there is already assignments & quizzes to be done. I know i shouldn't complain, i'm happy enough that i could at least study at monash. And i'm pretty sure almost everyone is complaining about work, stress, etc.. =P I shall not add to that.

But i still want to rant x)

I'm still stuck in my lazing mood x) Trying to start studying before lectures. Its been really tiring lately, and so confusing! Computer accounts, fees, letters, quizzes, blablabla.. So many things to settle !

And I have super long breaks, 4 hours the max >.< wonder what i'm gonna do then. Guess thats study time 4 me, since everyday is so packed. Glad I have friends to accompany me.

Sigh. I miss my dearest Evie & Adrian. Been thinking of them throughout my classes. I miss them so badly. But at least I still see Evie around =) Just not that often. Would be happier if I could see both Evie & Adrian.

Anyways, im glad i'm not alone in lectures/tutorials. Made some new friends =) And still seeing old friends =]

Lectures are super boring~ But i'm coping =]

Still got loads of stuff to do, but i'm exhausted. Gonna sleep soon. Another long day tomorrow.

=]

My Dearest ~

2009-03-01T05:44:00.000-08:00

My dearest Evie

Evie trying to steal the 'chicken drumstick' x)

=D

I love this dress x)

Vanilla & chocolate ice cream =P

Evie & I went to Sunway Piramid for our girly and emo time together.

Somehow, we always have emo talks together, but it helps that we do. Sometimes we all need someone to run to when we're upset. And i'm glad i have Evie. Its a blessing to have her as a best friend. Whether good or bad times, i know she's here to go through life with me =]

The outing was fun, it was a mixture of emo talks, and girly stuff, (like trying on dresses, camwhoring...) Thats what we girls do best =P

Evie was trying to find a dress for her masquerade ball, so we tried on many beautiful dresses! Tempting me to buy only >.< But I'm proud to say I didn't spend on clothes =D Bought only a necklace x)

I'm not gonna post pictures on all the dresses we tried, because we both look weird in it =P

Thats all. I really do appreaciate the time spent with her. Whether on the phone, shopping malls, or uni... Now we have uni , but the different timing and all makes it so hard for us to meet up more often. I'm already missing college life.. But anyways, uni is a start of a new chapter in life, its tough to fit in, but we'll get used to it soon enough =]

Sorry, but most of the pictures are identical to the ones in evie's blog. No nicer pictures x)

Take care~

Just alil bit...is all I need.

2009-02-23T23:35:00.000-08:00

Sometimes what we all need is just alil bit of encouragement, especially from the ones closest to us. Its hard to find someone who realises that need in every one of us. Different people, different perception. But i guess we all need encouragement & support to go through the bumps on our journey.

Life had been rough on me. But rougher when there's close friends saying things that just destroys me completely. Maybe its good advice, but what about the support we all need from our closest ones? Its the words from our closest that affects us most, change us, build us, or even break us. Its the ones we love that have the ability to hurt us most. Self-esteem, confidence & trust, all bonded together, can so easily be destroyed by our love ones. So easily destroyed, but so hard to find it back.

I don't know who I am anymore. I never felt this lost before. The perception of others on me seems to be taking over. I thought I know myself best. But i was wrong. I'm completely lost.

Your words were sharp, stabbing deep into my self-esteem, destroying it bit by bit. You affect me much more than others, because you're one of my closest. Who else would I thought to rely on? Of course the first person i go to when i'm upset would be my loved ones.

All I need, is alil bit of support and encouragement, to know that I am who I am, that i'm loved just for being me & not anyone else.

Love Hina

2009-02-21T22:51:00.000-08:00

This don't seem like my kind of thing. But it worked out X)

Adrian had been telling me to read this thingy called Love Hina weeks ago =]
Love Hina is a kind of manga or anime ( i'm not sure how to use those japanese terms)

But somehow i didn't get how to read it online, because it is read from the right to the left. Plus, the pictures & words all over the place! My eyes were sort of popping out after looking at the first page.
It seems so complicated to me, and i keep wondering why some people are just so fascinated by it. So I stopped reading at that time. Besides, i have other story books to read =)

But now...after finishing Breaking Dawn, i felt so bored, nothing to do and its my last day today to enjoy! (Orientation is tommorow) I've been so fascinated by japanese anime lately, and I think I know who influenced me so much to actually start reading manga online X)

Anyways, I started reading Love Hina again =P Its so enjoyable and cute at times, lol.

Sigh. 3 months of lazing and relaxing coming to an end. But i'm looking forward to what the future might bring =]

Outing with Kathleen (long overdue)

2009-02-21T01:56:00.000-08:00

At a restaurant =)

Drinking chocolate X)

Went out to 1 U with kathleen, my high school friend =) It was great, we managed to catch up with each other. And watched Inkheart =) was a wonderful show.

Hmm, lets see. Oh ya, kath & i shopped for stuff =)
She was looking for a pair of shorts while I looked around for a nice skirt.

And we tried out many kinds of dresses XD too bad i didnt bring my camera.

After all that, i met my sis up and went for dinner with her friend.

Overall, it was a great day =) enjoyed spending time with Kath. Glad to be updated on her life x)
Thats all, i'm off =)

Will post on my outing with evie as soon as i get pictures from her =D

If Only I Could Be There

2009-02-17T06:20:00.000-08:00

Knowing you're upset hurts me so much. I wish I could be there, to offer you a shoulder to cry on, and someone to hold. To take away the loneliness you're in. Why does it have to be this way? I can't even be there to listen can I? I only see your words. I can't hear you, nor see you. Only time will tell when I would see you again. What if I could be there? I could do so much more for you. But since we're stuck this way, I would make the best out of this. I would still find ways to reach you, to comfort you. Because knowing you're happy makes me happy. Just so you know that I care. If I could, I would take away your pain, to see you smile again.

Keeping you in my prayers.

Tagged by Evie (Again)

2009-02-17T05:33:00.000-08:00

Rules: Once you’ve been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it’s because I want to know more about you!

1) Loves to cook pasta X)

2) Can't sleep without my beloved bolster which has my scent on it

3) I can't stand waking up late in the morning, i think its a waste of time sleeping

4) Trying to gain at least 8 kg healthily

5) Dressing up and shopping depends on my mood

6) Loves pink/purple/black/turqoise =]

7) Wants to be a marine biologist and appear on National Geographic one day X)

8) Have to be alone after an outing/partying with friends

9) When it comes to friendship, I prefer quality over quantity

10) Loves camping / hiking etc..

11) Thinks alot & sometimes too much

12) Loves swimming of all other exercises (because I won't feel sticky & sweaty)

13) My face is much fairer than my hands & legs X)

14) I love my doggies

15) I love cheese!

16) Have weird dreams that seems so real

17) Cries in my dream, & wake up with a wet pillow

18) Loves going under the sun!

19) Can be really emo at times

20) I am really shy usually

21) My cheeks turn red very often

22) Hot-tempered

23) Loves cabbage, carbonara.

24) Loves decorating stuff =P

25) I miss my friends & loved ones very often

Esther's Farewell Party

2009-02-16T23:33:00.001-08:00

At Esther's place =]

Closer together =P

The SKYYE group =)
Su Faye, Kath, Yin Yiing, Me, Esther
*Love them all*

Esther & I in her lovely bedroom (which she won't be using >.<)

She left on the 15th of February for Australia.

I got to know her in form 4, we were in the same class and she's one of the sweetest girl in class. And not to mention, she has lots of admirers =P Even had a fan club in college XD

We ended up in the same college, but different courses. I really did enjoyed the times spent with her. I would remember it all.

Missing you Esther.

Will be waiting for your return.

What is Love?

2009-02-14T07:51:00.000-08:00

"Love is giving someone the ability to break your heart,
but trusting them not to"

"True love never dies for it is lust that fades away.
Love bonds for a lifetime but lust just pushes away"

P.s I love you =]

Happy Valentine's Day!

Its a day for couples to show their love. But remember that any other day with the ones you love is also special, so tell them how much you love them everyday . Love is never limited.

Peace =]

My Weird Dream ( The never ending chase)

2009-02-12T06:41:00.000-08:00

I was shopping in a huge mall with him. Everything seem so fine until a group of bad guys appear and started a killing spree. It was gruesome at first, but i can hardly remember how they killed those innocent shoppers.

Suddenly, the leader of the gang caught my eye, and ordered his men to capture me. (What a stupid dream XD) I was stunned, I couldn't move an inch. It was only when he (my companian) pulled me away that i started running in the opposite direction.

We ran, hand-in-hand, with the group of men chasing after us. 'How long could i run before they would catch up with me?', i thought. We ran passed shops, looking for a suitable one to hide in. All of the shops were extremely beautiful ( I still could remember how beautiful they look, I can't describe them =p )

We ran till we reach a door at the end of the building. He opened the door and pulled me in. Unfortunately we came face-to-face to a few flight of stairs ( like those emergeny stairs in tall buildings) Apparently this mall we were in is about 20 stories high. What more can we do but run down? There was no turning back as the badguys were closing in. We ran down the spiral stairs, and I could hear the heavy footsteps of the badguys on the stairs just right above me.

I couldn't take it anymore, I told him, I'm no sprinter nor athelete, I'm never fit to run! =P He kept pulling me forward, telling me "Run yie-ern, run!" So i kept pushing myself forward.

Finally we reach the bottom of the stairs, we burst out from the door and ran straight to the toilet. Somehow we got separated, because i ran into the guys toilet while he ran into the girls toilet to hide =.= I thought the badguys won't think I would enter the guys toilet. ( Stupid dream, like i said XD ) I hid in under the basin in the guys toilet while the badguys just ran passed the toilet, still after us.

I ran out of the toilet after the badguys left, and at the same time he came out of the girl's toilet. He held my hand and led me somewhere to escape the building. The badguys already spread out, looking for us at every corner of the mall.

As he and I were trying to locate the exit, one of the badguy & his friends saw us. There goes the chase again. Somehow, we were cornered with only one door left to run into. The badguys were so close to catching us, but he yanked the door open and pulled me into the unknown.

This time, there wasn't any stairs, just emptiness & darkness. He continue pulling me in as the badguys opened the door behind us. Suddenly, the floor & the walls shaked violently, and the floor turned 90 degrees (vertically), sweeping us down into the darkness. The last thing i saw was the shocked badguys looking down at us from the door as we fade into the darkness. Another close catch, i thought.

We landed hard on the pavement, but without a scratch. (Its just a dream =P ) I can't really remember the exact details of the location. Surprisingly everyone else in the mall seem oblivious to what's happening. The cashiers smiled at us, welcoming us to their shop. So far since the fall, we havent met any of the badguys, we were relieved. But not completely. We kept looking for a safe place to hide.

Then again, the badguys found us, so we ran. Ran & ran till we reach another door. (How many more doors do i have to open till i escape? =.= ) He opened it and we ran in again, hoping for something that would save us as we were getting exhausted.

In front of us, lay an open air train (like those in gold mines =P ) Without realising, we already ran out of the shopping mall, into the open air. We hopped into the train without a second thought, and the train speed up,leaving the badguys behind. Finally we escaped!! We were so happy and started embracing each other.

The train brought us high up into the night, way above the 20 stories mall. We sat there in awe, the night lights below us were beautiful. Fireworks exploded into the nightsky,and we both got frontview seats =D Everything felt so right as he held me in his arms while we enjoy the scenary & the fireworks. The breeze up there was soothing. Just the both of us. Away from danger. The badguys can't reach us here.
[My favourite part of the dream =D ]

Just when i thought we could escape, I suddenly remembered I left Evie behind in the shopping mall! (I have no idea how she suddenly appear in my dream =P ) I couldnt leave her behind, so we turned back into the mall...

Just when we entered the top floor of the mall (the train brought us there) the badguys saw us again. This time we ran straight into the nearest shop, which turns out to be a restaurant. Someone is having a wedding reception in that restaurant, which looked so beautiful. The walls,the tables, the chandelier...all looked perfect. The restaurant was full with women in dresses and men in their suits. All with smiles on their face. But it didnt last long.

We ran past the restaurant, pushing everyone in our way, then we heard screams as the badguys rushed in as well. We ran out from the other door, but was caught..

The leader and his men held us tight, and pushed us into another restaurant. Somehow, we managed to trick him, and escaped =P We ran. And we managed to find Evie! In an attempt to escape, we climbed through a window, and straight into someone's bathroom. ( It doesn't make sense, cause its just a dream XD) Someone was behind the glass door separating the bathtub and where me & Evie stood,but hadn't noticed us.My guy companion seems to have disappeared. But i know he's safe =)

Evie & I stood silently still as the guy in the bathtub came out of the glass door..'We're dead', we thought. A fat guy with a huge belly appear from the glass door, but he appeared to be a blind man..hahaha..evie and I were scared to death until we realise that the guy couldnt see us, and he didnt even notice we were there. We grinned at each other, and that was the end of my adventurous dream =)

The End~

I woke up in the morning, relieved it was only a dream. But i wanted it to continue, i wanted to see him again. When would I ever see him again? And I wanted to know the ending! All my dreams seem to end halfway through =.=

=]

Tagged by Evie

2009-02-11T06:02:00.000-08:00

Instructions:Remove one question from below, add in one of your own (personal), to make a total of 20.Tag 5 people in your list in the end of this post. Notify them.

1. At what age do you wish to be married?
Between 23 and 28 =)

2. Where is the place that you want to go the most?
Switzerland!

3. Do you believe in God?
Yes i do =)

4. Do you believe you can survive without money?
Yea, i would like to think i can, its not impossible.

5. What are you afraid to lose the most?
The ones i love

6. If you win RM 1 Million, what would you do?
Save it for honeymoon XD If i get married that is.

7. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
I don't think I would. I rather let the guy make the 1st move =P

8. Why do you think Evie is awesome? =) =) =)
Haha, for lots of reasons. I love her =]

9. What requirements you wish from your other half?
Able to communicate, understanding, loving, committed, loyal.

10. What do you wish to achieve this year?
To be a better person.

11. If you are given the chance to go back to the past and make a difference, will you?
Nope. I would never know what & who i wouldn't meet if I change my past.

12. Are you happy with your life now?
Yea =]

13. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
God, family and friends.

14. If there's ever a war (or things that are similar) happening in your place, are you going to move to a safer place, or fight?
Move to a safer place, but not until I make sure the ones I love are safe.

15. If you have the chance, which part of your character you would like to change?
My stubborness.

16. Who is the person that you can share all your problems with?
=]

17. What's your weakest point?
Feeling guilty for the smallest thing

18. What is the best thing that happened this year?
Stronger bond with mum =]

19. What do you hope to be in the future?
A marine biologist =)

20. What is the one thing you regret most?
Not treasuring my family much. But not anymore =)

Tag:
1) Kathleen
2) Seck Houng
3) Sheng Khai
4) Seng Wai
5) Yee En

What more can I do for you?

2009-02-08T09:48:00.000-08:00

I heard u cry, I heard u speak in pain,

I see the pain right through your eyes,

And I hear it in your voice,

But what more can i do for you?

Other than listening?

Why am I so helpless?

Why? Because I'm not in control of these things,

I'm just human, just like you,

Yet, i see u in pain so very often,

And it kills me to just sit and watch.

But what more can I do for you?

Tell me, please.

Patience dear,patience,

God listens, and He answers prayers,

The only thing I could do to help,

Besides listening..

Would be to offer you a prayer,

You know I'll keep you in mine.

So keep your head up during hard moments,

For you're never alone.

Thank you for being there.

Pictures to describe CNY holidays =]

2009-02-03T22:04:00.000-08:00

The gentle mother cat =] (my uncle's place)

And her 2 little kittens (with my siblings)

My sis. I find this picture cute XD

The mischevious little thing on a motobike =p

And another pampered kitty in my arms

My uncle's half paralyzed dog..with the help

of a 'doggie wheelchair'

Its been almost a week since i visited my relatives, and i'm already missing my cousins and their kids so much.

I'm kinda lazy to describe my CNY holidays, since so many good (and bad) things happened but mainly good. The little things i enjoy most about visiting my relatives are watching & playing with the little kids =) It was so much fun seeing them run around doing stupid things which would only look cute on kids XD Oh well, what else could a bunch of 5 & 6 year-olds do besides looking cute and driving you crazy =P

And...not forgetting the pets my uncles have. From dogs to cats to chickens XD I don't understand why i take so much interest in them. But thats just me i guess.

Somehow the angpaos i got don't mean much to me, since i could always ask my parents for money. Its a really strange thing i know.

Alright, enough of the details =) It gets kinda boring, lol. Sorry but the only pictures taken during CNY visits are those with my uncle's pets =P Should have taken some pictures with the kids..but i was worried i would scare them off. lol. weird, but true.

My very first =)

2009-01-26T07:53:00.000-08:00

Here goes my very first post =]

First of all, would like to wish all of u a Happy Chinese New Year! Do enjoy your holidays while u can, and also the yummy food and angpaos =)

Funny how i suddenly felt like creating a blog =) Just wanted to put my thoughts and pictures here so i can look back at it and laugh as the years go by.

And yea, i might be super emo at times, so bear with me =P I hope to keep in touch with friends i havent seen in a long time, so leave a message at the chatbox when you drop by =)

I'l post something on my CNY holidays asap =)

God bless~